Transformation Tuesday

In the internet world, it's #TransformationTuesday !  I decided that I would use this post to serve as the starting point to look at for any future Transformation Tuesdays.

Yesterday was not my best run. I got way too in my head and put way too much pressure on myself before I even left work.  You can see my stats at the bottom of this post. HOWEVER ! I do not want to turn into Negative Nancy so I will focus only on good things and will use New Girl gifs in place of bad things because it makes them not seem so bad.

First of all, the biggest thank you in the world to Brian for running with me yesterday. Unlike the last time we ran at Hibernian together, I didn't trip and fall and die. Major points to me but even more major points to him for putting up with my crazy. And also for joining in on "PARKOUR !" (I direct you back to this list if you're confused).  I should mention that with the exception of the couple times I've run with a seasoned runner, really the only "coaching" I've ever gotten is, "DE PINTO ! YOUR BUTT BETTER CROSS THIS LINE BEFORE THIS STOPWATCH REACHES 16 MINUTES ! DON'T MAKE ME FAIL YOU !" (That was my gym teachers in high school during the mile and yes, I walked it.)

Overall last night there was a lot of walking, a lot of trouble breathing, and some really good coaching. My biggest mental problem is that my head is way more ambitious than my body. The same thing keeps going through my head:

Which makes me want to do better than I am while simultaneously making me want to give up and collapse into a tiny ball on the pavement. But I digress.

The first mile is always pretty good at Hibernian because it's mostly downhill and I'm super pumped and so ready to go ! I tend to go out too fast and don't save anything for Raleigh's awesome terrain during the last 2 miles.

So now, my brain is trying to tell me that I'm super awesome and should be doing so much better and to go faster and run harder and my body is basically saying "STOP MOVING YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME". I am my own worst enemy and I will fully admit that. I had to walk for a little bit to get my breathing right.  After what seemed like walking forever (it was maybe a 1:00-1:30) I was still mentally doing okay and started going again, trying not to push as hard as quickly. It was after I had to stop again (and once more after that) that I got upset with myself and really just wanted to give up. The only 2 thoughts I had were, "Maybe I'm not cut out for this," and:

I made it back to Hibernian though.  I put one foot in front of the other (whether walking or running) and didn't fall down, stop, or die. I could very easily give up, call it quits, complain about how I'm never going to win at running the way that all my friends do OR I could keep working.

Things I learned last night that I will continue to focus on:

• Stay more upright - when I start to have trouble breathing I tend to hunch over and that is basically the opposite of helping
• Back off on the hills - I may be taking shorter steps but until I can run without stopping, I need to slow down
• Focus on my breathing - I tend to only do this once it's too late and start breathing too shallow.

My biggest goal right now is making this my new mantra:

In reality I've only been running for a year (not continuously either) and yet I always find myself comparing my progress to people that have been running forever.  It's one of the biggest things I need to overcome and stop doing. I need to start focusing on doing MY best. 

Spin class tonight ! I plan on using it as an opportunity to work on focusing on my breathing.

Thanks for reading !